it was so, so hard to say goodbye.

first goodbye
to 2 frangipani, my dearest girls. i had to get out of class as quickly as i could before the girls see my tearful eyes. the girls were saying goodbyes, and many wanted a hug. but, i just could not face them. all i could do, was to hug sideways while i face the table pretending i was busy packing. not the way i wanted to say goodbye, but my emotions got the better of me. even now, as i remember that very scene, the tears can't flowing..

second goodbye
the teachers at staffroom 2. saying goodbye, i tried to control my tears and it was so damn hard. it was a great time i've had there, fun bunch of people they were.. will miss working with them.
thank you michelle, hannizah, veron, agnes, evi, and everyone else for this wonderful time.

third goodbye
to aunty liza at the GO, she had been so nice and helpful, and as she sent her best wishes and all, i was fighting so hard to hold my tears.

fourth goodbye
after leaving the GO, i went to the sfe room to look for mrs ho. the moment i stepped in the room, i just broke down. i couldn't hold it any longer. even now..
right there and then, all i could think of is this is my last day, this is my last day. i won't be seeing them anymore. i just couldn't control, i know i suck at this. worst thing is two of my p5 girls from the centre were in the room. had the intention to go over to the centre, but i realised i couldn't. i cannot assure myself that i won't cry in front of them. because i know i will. mdm leck called from the centre, and i struggled so hard even though i was only talking through the phone. half the time i kept quiet cos i couldn't speak. she told me that my p2s were waiting for me to go over. seriously, i think i suck at controlling my emotions. and its taking me such a long time to type this cos i can't see through all my tears. stupid tear ducts of mine. but i know i'll have to let it out somewhere.
mrs ho said she wouldn't say goodbye- i know that we can still meet up frequently and all, but it just won't be the same anymore.. won't be seeing her and the girls 5 days a week anymore, won't be working with her anymore, won't be joking around anymore. life's gonna change drastically for me, and i don't know if i'll adapt. cos the memories have been placed so deep in my heart, it has been part of my life, it has been what i look forward to everyday.. i've never liked school as much as i do now.. i admit one reason's that i'm not the one studying, haha, but that's a really tiny reason. each morning i'll have no trouble dragging myself out of bed (yes i still have to drag myself out of bed, but its much easier) because i look forward to seeing the girls. i enjoy my work, and this makes it so much easier. people who work for the money will never enjoy their job. seriously.

thank you mrs ho - my motherly friend, 2 frangi, and 6 daisy for the wonderful 10 months i've spent at sacps. thank you for being part of my life, and i thank God for bringing them into my life.


its so hard to say goodbye, and i'll miss you all.